When dating, I feel bad that guys are expected to pay for everything. It does feel a little unequal at times. It feels a little hooker-ish when the guy takes you out to dinner and then their reward is… What? Your presence? Making out in the car? Going back to their place for the night?
I started thinking of the cost of dating. Luckily the guys in Cleveland have it easier than in other cities, such as LA or NY. In general it’s just cheaper in the Midwest than in other places. It’s expected that the guy pays for the date. At least, if you have a guy that thinks so. Otherwise it could get awkward. That’s not to say that I haven’t ever offered to pay! I have! And thankfully the guy said no way. Usually the guy reaches for the check, and pays, and I just say thank you. I’m also not going out for the sole reason to get a free dinner. I don’t even eat that much. At least, not on a date.
But it’s not cheap for girls to date. I just spent $230 on 5 pieces of clothing, that could be used for date nights, and about $150 on two bras and 4 matching undies (I had a coupon). New guy, new lingerie. Bras aren’t cheap guys! And good ones cost even more, between $70-$150 per bra. And then, you have to get the matching undies, because what is the point otherwise.
Then there is shaving and waxing. A bikini wax costs $40 or more, and this is something women get every 3-4 weeks. Women’s razors are dumb expensive, for no good reason. They just know we can’t use electric razors like men can, and so we are forced to buy expensive pink razors, that have bells and vibrating whistles. And because we have to shave often (every day or every other day), then we also have to buy the shaving cream, and the after shave balms. Its a racket.
Hair, make-up, and skin care – it all adds up quick. You can use short cuts if you know what you are doing. But I’m like Lucille Ball over here with my red hair, and I’m not trusting just anyone to color it. So every about 3 months, because I’m cheap and lazy, I get my hair colored by a professional. And then there is makeup. Which we do not wear for the guys. We wear for us. It’s our war paint for sure. It’s a mask that we wear to present ourselves a certain way, and then are treated in a certain manner as well. Example: I once had blonde hair and natural make-up, everyone treated me like a stupid kid, now I have red hair and more often bold make-up and people treat me like they expect me to be sassy and sarcastic. What? Bring it.
As a single person I notice that I do wear more make-up. And, that I’m willing to experiment with it more. AND, that I will wear a bolder lip color because I’m not worried about some guys opinion.
THEN, on top of it all, if you are a single parent there is the cost of a babysitter (on the rare occasion that you are going out on a date when you have kids at home, otherwise hopefully they are at their dads). I don’t know if you realize how much a babysitter costs. Good LUCK trying to find someone for $8 an hour. Ha! I wish! I don’t have a pool of free sitters in this city. So I pay $15 an hour. YES! $15 AN HOUR. This better be a damn good date.
So, next time I start to feel bad about a guy spending $20 on me at dinner, I plan to remember how much I spent looking presentable on said date. And then, I’ll offer to pay my half….