Romance is dead. Right?! I mean when was the last time someone who was interested in you, made that interest know in a romantical way?
I don’t really like the lovey dovey stuff. Usually. Mostly because I over think things – I think. Mostly it has to do with feeling undeserving of it, or questioning the intent. But when dreaming up the perfect man, he would be able to do these things and not make it feel forced or weird. They would just happen. Well, this is my top 10 romantic gestures that I secretly love.
If you have to ask for the thing you want to have happen, then it’s not romance. And really, many times, we don’t know what that gesture is until it actually happens. It’s often the thing we say we don’t want, and then magically it appears and it’s amazing.
For example – FLOWERS. Don’t tell me I need to tell a guy that I want flowers. If I have to tell the guy that I like flowers, then its over. Flowers are done. It’s lazy. Now, if he see that I buy myself flowers? Or if it comes up in conversation that I like or don’t like a certain type of flower? Then still fair game. The spontaneous flowers gift is and remains one of THE best and most romantic gestures a guy can make IF we have not discussed the giving of said flowers. Talk to me about it and I’ll tell you its a waste of time and money. The flowers die, blah blah blah. Seriously dudes, as long as she doesn’t have any severe allergies, buy the flowers. She will love that you did. Even if she hates the actual flower, she will love the effort.
HAND HOLDING. The holding of hands. Interlocked fingers mingling and playing. Except I kinda hate hand holding. I mean, I do think that it’s sweet at times for short intervals, but if you have to hold my hand every waking moment that we are next to each other then dude, get a life. I mean, maybe there are girls that like that more. I’m just saying that a romantic gesture, in this case holding hands, gets not so romantic when it happens all the time. Or when it happens in order to show dominance, or stake a claim, or whatever other manipulative shit people do.
SINGING. Yes. Do this. DO THIS! Even if you are bad. Bonus points up the WAZOO if you are good. For the love of all that is holy, a guy singing something even remotely love dovey sappy is amazing. For the record. We may laugh. Or Giggle. Or make fun of you a tad. But get out there at karaoke and sing “Can’t Take My Eyes Off of You” and you will get laid. Fact. Hell! Even lip sync something on the radio while driving, still works.
COFFEE. Do you know my go-to coffee order? Do you know how I like it even if I’m ordering it like Sally from When Harry Met Sally? Can you just pick up coffee and bring it to me like the coffee fairy and it’s perfect? Now that is romance. That tells me this is a guy that is interested. This is a guy that cares about me, and my needs. This is a guy that wants to make me happy. Feel free to sub for tea, or say, Chipotle order. I mean, if you can just come home with my favorite order from my favorite take out place and save me from having the “what shall we get for dinner” talk, then that’s love.
DANCING. The art of dancing is lost on us. Not many people can waltz or whatever. And most people I know who are past clubbing age don’t want to go to a sweaty club to dance anyway. But really, if a song comes on, and a guy takes you into his arms and sways, turns you, maybe does a little dip and kiss and then moves on? I mean STOP IT! STOP RIGHT THERE! TAKE ME NOW! That is a smooth move that any lady will remember and love!
CHORES. Pick a chore. Any chore. No not that one. Just kidding. Kinda. Do something like get her car washed, or put gas in it for her. Listen, I would be a giant fan of the guy who insists on pumping gas for me, even if I’m still paying for it. Take out the trash when you are over. Maybe wash a few dishes. It doesn’t have to be huge, just something little to be helpful. It is noticed and appreciated!
OPENING DOORS. All the doors. So many doors. Just open the door. And the car door. Make it a habit. Do it forever. That will be the thing she says is romance when you are 80 and you still do it. TRUST!
SPLURGE. Find something you know she loves, and save for an occasional splurge. Define splurge in your own way. It doesn’t have to be a lot of money, it could be just your time if you happen to not get a lot of time together. Fancy night out on the town? Long weekend in the woods? Totally up for interpretation.
GIFTS. Mini gifts. Little things that she may have mentioned in passing that she likes. Her favorite beverage? That book she wanted to get? Something she’s mentioned needing but hasn’t had the time to get yet? Her favorite candy or snack? All little windows of opportunity my friend. Take it. Be romantic.
MASSAGES. Massages that do not end in a nudge nudge wink wink. Seriously guys. Give the occasional foot, or back massage for like 10 minutes, and then just walk away. Let her fall asleep relaxed and without the pressure of sex. It will be that much sexier. Same goes for a good make out session. Just. Walk. Away. She will find you.
And bonus – Inside jokes. Something that you know will bring out a smile and a laugh. Because the couple that laughs together, stays together. Or something like that.