Dear Match: This isn’t going to work

I’m breaking up with Match.com. I misjudged the amount of time left on my subscription, so oops, I’m in until March. Maybe I’ll find someone by then – or maybe it will continue to be a big waste of time!

Match.com SOUNDS like it should work. In Theory. A website that people are joining for real connections. Who really want to find their person. In reality, though….

Y’all know how Match.com works? You sign up, make a profile, add a few pictures. You get “daily matches” Usually 12 people based on your search preferences and deal breakers. You can also just go on and search. You can “like” a photo, send a “wink”, or message through the site.

I have not met anyone via match that I would be interested in dating long term. I think I’ve only gone on one actual Match date.

Here are the three types of guys I encountered most often.

Playboys – These guys have migrated from the other apps, probably lured by the promise that you can now swipe on Match. Don’t get me wrong, there are playgirls too. These people are now on the app, because more apps more exposure to people, that was meant for people trying to make a real connection. I mean, that was the draw in the past. People came to Match who were serious about finding their person, their lobster, find something long term, or get married. And now, its just another dating app in a sea of dating apps, so you have to sort out the playboys, if you aren’t looking to play. I’m paying for this, I don’t want to deal with the same riffraff as the other sites. Its annoying and just makes me wonder why I’m not using the other site since I’ll have to do so much sifting anyway.

Socially Awkward – There are a lot of guys using online dating because they don’t know how to talk to women in real life. Or because they aren’t confident. Or because they have an interesting quirk and need to find just the right lady who is into that quirk. Me, I’m annoyed by it all. I’m annoyed by your silly quirks. I’m annoyed by the self deprecating. I’m annoyed by alllllll the bad pictures of guys who don’t think it matters. I’m annoyed by the guys who send messages, create a rapport, and then NEVER ask the girl out.

Genuinely Not a Match – And then, as ever, there are nice, cute, genuine guys looking for a serious relationship, or at least to make real connections with people. Just not me. Which is not to say I don’t know that this is how all apps work. BUT I don’t have to pay for all apps. Nope. There are a lot of members, but they just aren’t a good match for me. Or I’m just not a good match for them. I can go to basic swipe app and get the same thing.

People go to Match, because if you have to pay for the messaging feature, then you must get better messages? Nope. Not true. At least, not anymore. As dating apps have become the norm, and paying for extras is available on many of the sites that still let you message for free, there is no good reason to use Match. In my opinion.

Now if you like Match the best in terms of how to use it and features, then go right ahead, everyone has their favorite. Match didn’t work for me, so I’m letting it go.

 

 

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5 thoughts on “Dear Match: This isn’t going to work

  1. I always thought Match was the better, more “legit” dating site/app so after some not-so-ideal experiences on Tinder, Bumble and the like, I joined.

    And I hated it. The caliber of men was just AWFUL (trashy, overtly sexual, dumb, etc) and there seemed to be no factoring in the criteria I listed. If I said I wanted men aged 30-40, I got messaged by 18 year olds. PASS. I deleted and will never go back!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I once paid for Match, with the same thoughts of why it must be better there…. I mean, they are PAYING to be there, so doesn’t that make it a common assumption that the people would be more dedicated to being serious???? NO.. It means NOTHING. It means some asshole is pocketing your hard earned cashed to give you the same riff raff as Plenty of Fish and all the other sites.

    So I don’t pay. I do, however, sometimes just uninstall the app from my phone (I will only have ONE active at a time to avoid over load)…. and sometimes I’ll just uninstall everything and go a while without it at all> its sort of nice. Like leaving your cell phone home… after you work through the separation anxiety of that… its freeing.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Every site/app markets a certain way, but the users and their behaviors decide what they’re really for.
    Bumble is marketed as a woman friendly app, but it’s not like men don’t use to for hookups, or ghost the women they meet, or behave any differently than they would on Tinder.
    Match, and other paid sites, might market themselves as being used primarily by serious relationship seekers, but $$ spent does not a committment seeking person make.
    I recommend trying out as many apps as you can, and sticking with the ones you have the best experience on, regardless of their reputation.

    Liked by 1 person

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